Sept 19th - Talk Like A Pirate Day

My pirate name is:

Calico Charity Rackham

Often indecisive, you can't even choose a favorite color. You're apt to follow wherever the wind blows you, just like Calico Jack Rackham, your namesake. You have the good fortune of having a good name, since Rackham (pronounced RACKem, not rack-ham) is one of the coolest sounding surnames for a pirate. Arr!

Get your own pirate name from piratequiz.com

Dog sprayed by a skunk?

This is the fail-proof recipe for cleaning up a skunk-sprayed dog. I know because I had to do this one late night last summer.

• 1 pint hydrogen peroxide
• 2/3 cup baking soda
• 1 tablespoon of citrus-based liquid soap

With gloves on, sponge this mixture into the dog's fur, and rub it in down to the skin if you can. Let sit two to five minutes, then rinse with plain water. If a second batch is needed, use fresh ingredients.

If this mixture, or skunk spray, has gotten into the dog's eyes, use a wet rag soaked in milk to wipe the eyes. Wring the rag out over the eyes for best results (dripping it directly into the eyes) or if the dog will sit still, gently wipe around the eyes with the rag. Results should be immediate.

Update on the BS that continues

Well - my naivete and trust in people who shouldn't be trusted has come around to bite me again. Namely my ex, who we will refer to here as AzHol.

Not only did AzHol lie to me about the refinancing being possible, he said it could happen ASAP and that it would correct both of our credit scores. I talked to the refi guy he talked to and none of it's true (so many people told me this but I was SO hoping for an easy resolution here...) So I had to forward an email from refi guy to my lawyer, stating the truth, and figure out how the heck I am going to pay the already past due mortgage payments, along with the payments that will be due from this point on, since I am most likely going to be awarded the house in the court hearing in October... I am still trying to refi for myself, and hopefully with just a few ontime payments under my belt I can swing it sooner rather than later. An interest only loan would work best but you have to have pretty good credit and mortgage payment history to qualify.

It just pisses me off to no end, that I am making more money than I have in my whole life, and yet I have nothing to show for it... 1/3 of my income each month is going to a house payment for a house I DON'T LIVE IN!! I have no "extra" money EVER, no savings, and very little in the 401K. I might as well throw my money into a hole in the ground.

So I'm feeling pretty low today... and then I get a call about needing to have me sub at the local softball league... so after my 8 hour workday (2 of which have been actually on the phone with the mortgage company and lawyer and refi guy) I go to a 1-hour yoga class, then zip home to pick up the dog, and change clothes again for softball and have to take the dog with me. I certainly hope they are not expecting much out of me, I SUCK at softball worse than I do at golf.

So it's a little early for this but I think it's fun

Halloween being one of my favorite holidays (I'm a frustrated actress I guess), we were challenged during our department meeting a couple of weeks ago to develop a theme for Halloween for the marketing department. Our boss suggested When the Grinch Stole Halloween which I think is cool. So I wrote this up and gave it to her (yes she loved it!).

When the Grinch Stole Halloween

Copyright 2006 Shannon Edwards

There’s the time he stole Christmas, but it all came out right
Because of Cindy Lou Who, some roast beast and starlight
But the Grinch took another day -- it’s the worst thing we’ve seen
Come walk through Whoville, and try to save Halloween.

First he outfitted Max with devil horns and a cape
The poor thing looked pathetic, his head wrapped in duct tape
The Grinch himself got dressed up too
As a fierce looking mobster with a greasy hairdo

Then he loaded some bags and some empty old sacks
On that same sleigh and hitched up old Max
Then the Grinch said “Giddyap” - the sleigh started down
Toward the homes where the Whos were decorating the town

They were hanging up twine webs and plastic spiders
And other fun things that were sure to frighten
Like stuffed Kleenex ghosts hung from tree branches
And black cat cutouts raised up on their haunches

There were paper skeletons hanging on doors
And fog machines started, just like the moors
Pumpkin-face bags full of leaves all around
RIP tombstones and zombie hands stuck in the ground
Even a vampire’s coffin with authentic fake locks
And a seven-foot cornhusk tied to a mailbox

Then the Grinch swept in and yelled at the children
“Give me those jack-o-lanterns, wax teeth and black cauldrons!
The cider in jugs and caramel apples on sticks
All of the treats and all of the tricks!
I’m here to steal Halloween and I’ll do it right
So you Whos won’t eat any candy tonight!”

Just then Cindy Lou, and Cindy Lou’s brother
Along with Cindy Lou’s father and mother
Said “Wait a minute Grinch, it seems to us
That you’re a big bully and causing a fuss
Over a night that’s silly and full of sweets
You’re already dressed, so join us and see!”

Maybe it was the smell of the chocolaty Snickers
Or Max’s brown eyes pleading over his whiskers
But the Grinch’s plot was foiled again
By those nice Whos, who made him a friend.

Then Halloween night was a joy for them all
As they went door to door with that plaintive call
The one you can hear from down the street:
TRICK OR TREAT! TRICK OR TREAT! TRICK OR TREAT!